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We talked endlessly of school and careers, of each other’s families and upbringing, of our individual hopes and expectations for marriage, and of our feelings about children and parenthood.
A well-known maxim recommends longer courtships followed by shorter engagements. Brown concurs: “Infatuation may be romantic, glamorous, thrilling, and even urgent, but genuine love should not be in a hurry. Time should be taken for serious thought, and opportunity given for [each partner to gain] physical, mental, and spiritual maturity.
Longer acquaintances will enable both to evaluate themselves and their proposed companions, to know each other’s likes and dislikes, habits and dispositions, aptitudes and aspirations” ( Salt Lake City: Bookcraft, 1960, pp. Building a strong premarital friendship requires spending sufficient time with each other and finding opportunities for interaction.
Perhaps other individuals who are approaching—or already in the middle of—a marriage-oriented relationship could consider these ideas as well.
Because courtship should continue throughout marriage, spouses too can benefit by seeking to strengthen and renew their friendships with their partners.
I know of couples who spent almost their entire engagement separated because of work or school.
Similarly, some couples count a partner’s years on a mission as courtship time.
Taking his wife, Flora, by the hand, he assisted her out, and they walked arm in arm to a seat in the viewing stand.
We were all inspired by their obvious love for each other. The Bensons’ courtship stretched over seven years, more than four of which they spent apart, writing letters.
Dating can help build this foundation; but unless participated in wisely, dating can also prove disastrous.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating