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My own father (now deceased) could be a very difficult person.

Trying to connect with him was like jumping in a pool with only 6 inches of water.

I know there must have been more in there, but God love him, he couldn't express it, and neither myself, my siblings, nor my mother could reach it.

When you have compassion, their difficult behaviors might still annoy or offend you, but they won't cause you as much pain because it redirects your focus from yourself to them.

If the behaviors are so bad and the wounds so deep, it is hard to genuinely feel compassion.

It's always good to begin these conversations with something positive.

You can mention how much you value them and the relationship.I have another friend whose father had a borderline mental illness.He was sane enough that he appeared “normal” — but he really had the emotional maturity of a teenager.And more importantly, how can you protect yourself from being continually hurt and disrupted by their behavior?As I mentioned before, most of the bad behaviors with these difficult people stem from their own issues.And depending on the dynamics and interactions of your own extended family, you can have other difficult family members (cousins, aunts, uncles, grandparents) who are regularly in your life making you miserable.

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