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So I tried again with another group, and then another. After downing a drink (or two), I decided to try again with another group.

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Why did women suddenly respond with enthusiasm rather than distaste?

Whether it’s friends, family, religion, or media — many of us were raised to think that expressing our sexual interest (flirting) was wrong. This is especially true for many women who are afraid of being seen as “slutty” or too forward.

She may challenge you and put you on the spot about why you’re asking about this sensitive subject.

The absolute worst things you can do are apologize or try to explain why you didn’t mean to be “weird”.

With a tipsy grin I shot back, “Oh please, we’re all adults here.

I stumbled over my words trying to explain myself, “Umm.. I’m sorry if it came off like that.” They told me how it weird and they weren’t going to answer a question like that. They initially gave me the same attitude, but this time the liquid courage gave me a comeback.

Your attitude has to convey that they’re a healthy part of building a romantic connection.

I’m not expecting you walk up to random women with questions women like that. In fact, I’ve found that while that approach can work, you usually get a much stronger response and connection if you wait until later in the conversation.

A couple of questions is often all you need to turn things from friendly to romantic.

— You aren’t going to magically fall into bed with a woman.

All you’re going to do is reinforce that this subject is shameful and wrong.

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